People I Don't Hang Out With

 These past few days people have been annoying me something frightful.  It's not kind I know.

1.  People who go to basketball games or any sporting event and come back to tell me that the "Cheerleaders were just awful." 

2.  People who complain about kids and their hair today.  I could careless if kids have mohawks and dye their hair pink.  Big deal.  If I don't like someone's hairstyle, it's MY problem not their's.

Ok - I guess that list isn't so big - but who are the people you don't want to hang out with?

Things Kids Tell Me

When I sub in some of the younger grades, the little kids are so quick to rat out their parents.  Let me tell you this, I know a lot of dirt!

Ok  - really I don't.

Kids just talk.  A lot.  And lie. A lot.

And sometimes - what they say are profoundly true.

"How many brothers do you have?"  I asked Kay.

"I don't"  she smiled smugly at me.  "I've got two little sisters."

"Ohhhhh..."  I say knowing she has two older brothers.

After a gentle reminder to the  class about consideration...

One girl called out -

"My dad thinks the world revolves him.  He's so selfish."

"Ohhhhhhhh..."  I say.

Two Kids

So, we're at the football game.  We're standing at the sidelines making small talk with some acquaintances.  Not our best friend  - Not a relative - Jussssssttt someone we know casually...

And he asks us - "Are you two stopping at two?"

"Two what?"

"Two kids..."

"Yep."

"Why?"

Well - I guess I didn't know that this was anyone's business. 

"Well... we have separate bedrooms.."

Naaaaa...   I didn't say that.

I just changed the subject.

Second Piece

Old lady: "Is that your second piece of cake?"

Me: "Yes."

Old lady: "I'd watch it if I were you."

Good at Something

I sat at the pool - you know - my usual summer time thing - and one of my brother-in-law's co-workers sat next to me.

For some reason, she thought it would be an OK thing to complain about my sister to me.  Now, for sure, I know my sister isn't a perfect being - why I sure know this - I've seen her at her worst - but - hmmm??  Really, someone thinks it's an ok thing to bad-mouth one's sibling?

She went on and on about how perfect my brother-in-law is - yes, he's pretty awesome!  And then, on and on how my sister doesn't appreciate him.  On and on how my sister couldn't keep a clean house or weed her gardens.

I didn't quite know how to handle this.  For one thing, I had started having a life of my own.  I mean, instead of criticizing everyone, I decided to try and give people a break.  You know, minding my own business instead of laughing at others' sad lives.

I really wondered how she had the nerve. 


I turned to her and said "Well, she must be good at something! Wink. Wink." 

She picked up her stuff and walked away from me and sat someplace else.

She hasn't talked much to me since then either.

Thankssssss

Yesterday my daughter announced that she was going to start washing her face with soap.  I said - "Naw.. soaps not good for your face."

"Yeah - but I use soap on my hands, and there's no pimples on my hands."


"Yeah - I don't use soap on my face."

She turned to me with a crooked smile raising her arms to me "Aaa yeah?"  And rolls her eyelids shaking her head.

Thanks for the info kid!

Tweeting Too Hard

I found a new blog via Cary McNeal from List of The Day - Tweeting too Hard.  These tweets rank right up there with those guys who put pics of their naked chest as their facebook profile!

My Wife is Sexy

Back when I was in college - no- not the two years ago in college - but the time that was fourteen years ago college - I had a speech class with a well-known news anchor.  His name rhymes with Peve Stoitras.

This was my class - does that make any sense - of course it doesn't.  I mean, I was the teacher's pet because I was the only twenty-two year old in a midst of eighteen year olds.  I was the annoying lady who knew everything.

I had missed the final.  I went in the next stay to make it up. 

As I handed it to him, he told me that I got an A.  I had an amazing voice for speaking.  We visited  a while more about my home town.  Suddenly, he turned to me and said

"You know, Bobbi, my wife is very sexy."



"Oh kayyyyyyy  Well, thanks for everything."   Stretch - Yawn - Leave


(READ HERE - Thanks for the info!)

The NEWS

Do you have a friend or two who have to be the first to tell you THE NEWS?

Yeah - that's always great.  I know when I turn my cellphone on after a long day at school and there's a voicemail that I'm in for a treat.  The message usually goes like this;

"OH MY GAWD... DID YOU HEAR?"  because yes - it's always THAT important.  "SO and SO is getting a divorce".  And let me tell you, the other person always feels so bad.  "I FEEL so BAD."  This person is emphatic.  "WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO DO?"

"I JUST THOUGHT YOU'D WANT TO KNOW."

Yes - they always talk in caps lock.
This friend is always the one who has to call you and tell you someone has died.

Thanks for the info!

Facebook Status Fail

I am amazed at what people share on their statuses. 

Political rants

Medical diagnosis

Their children's nap cycles

Potty training news

But, what takes the cake is one special update -

Afternoon Delight - yeah - Thanks for the info- I really needed to imagine that as I was checking out my Zoo World.